want to be pregnant

guys i want to be pregnant haha...

http://malepregnancy.com/

check this out...

wishes hehe...

feel like learn a lot of things...

want to learn to weave sweaters and scarf and stuff for my someone hehe...

want to give birth to babies for my someone (scientifically proved that it is possible for guys to be pregnant)...

want to marry to someone haha...

want to do lots of things lah hehe...

想成为一个‘贤妻良母’型的住家男人。。。

means...

i want to be a 'good wife great mother'[cantonese= yin chai liong mou] type househusband...

HAHA...

sorry that it had been a time since my last blog...

sorry sorry...

haix many things had happened...

honestly mostly are those sad things which will just kill me in a shot...

whatever forget about that...

i am sick at this moment...

having a bad cough... soar throat + no voice at all for last few days... fever + flu due to walking in the heavy downpour when i was on my way to klcc on sunday... and bla bla bla... haix...

things are getting harder and harder... especially studies...

being absent for days is great... but it turned out to be damn hard as i need to chase the topics taught by the lecturers... and well i am lazy... so... SUCKS...

haix... feel like leaving lah haix...

applied for a job at school, they would accept me if i DONT STUDY... means i have to stop schooling to work (if i want to)...

haix...

can i just dont study? haha...

whatever...

i am going to Brunei for my cousin later... (not that early lah)

from 28 Sept to 11 Oct only...

haix so short... hehe...

well wish me good luck lah...

see ya guys...

wasnt chosen for afs student exchange programme...

well i just called my cousin in penang and asked her about i have any letter from afs (antarabudaya malaysia) or not... still remember i told you guys i applied for the student exchange programme to usa that one... this one loh...

and unfortunately i wasnt chosen :( so damn disappointed...

haix... i dont know why but i seem to be very 'soi' (bad luck) nowadays...

firstly my brother kxx event... then kxxren event... so disappointed with them... haix... then now the afs thing not being selected... damn disappointed now... haix...

plu-friendly cafes...

these are the plu-friendly cafés i found at here...


BJBS Café & Bujian Busan Karaoke
G/F 115 Jln 3/93 Tmn Miharja Cheras, KL. 012-2971833 / 012-3156522

Coffee Klub
Plaza Berjaya, KL.

Jln Imbi Café
175 Jln Maharajalela, KL. 03-21418141

Er Jiu
Tengkat Tong Shin, KL.

Green Lotus
No. 30 & 38 Ground Floor, Jln Walter Grenier, Off Jln Imbi, KL. 03-21413007

Jiak Guan
27 Tengkat Tong Shin, KL. Tel : 03 2143 2287

Rahsia Bistro & Wine Bar
13 Jln Damai, KL. 03-2142-5555

One Pandan Leaf House
64G Jln 5/101C, Cheras Business Centre, KL 03-91334566

69 Bistro
14 Jln Kampung Dollah, off Jln Pudu (Behind Times Square), KL. 03-21443369

PLU Café
68-0-4, Block H, Cheras Business Centre, Cheras, KL. 013-3017898

miss performing...

i miss performing on the stage...

it had been a time since my last performance on the stage...

let's see...

my ever last stage performance is during the drama competition in dewan sri pinang, 2003...

until now i havent been acting much (i mean on the stage ones)...

haix...

new environment...

hi guys... it had been three days since my last blog... which i did before i moved to wangsa maju, my new place... moved cause wangsa maju is nearer to my college... hehe...

now in my school's CIT (communication information technology) room... which is computer room loh haha... online... there are about 200 computers here... and almost everyone is online now... so... SLOW... haix... i was trying to get into post-creating page for a few times before i can get into one haha... school's cit room is so crowded as everyone is entitles to 500 free hours of internet usage... that's why lah haha...

mmm... about my new place... ok-ok lah... not bad lah haha... basically i dont have any problem as i used to moving around alone... used to being independant (being alone actually)... haix... BORED... no tv (i dont think i will switch it on under normal condition if there is any HAHA)... no CD (i forgot to bring my CD collections!!!)... no computer (SHIT!) and the most important thing, NO STREAMYX (OMG THIS IS THE MOST SHIT THING!!!)...

haix... my monthly rental fees is 250... excluding electric water and telephone... you see lah so damn expensive... SHIT... haix... while i saw some notices at the notice board which looks for roommates offers cheaper monthly rental fees... haix... unfortunately i cant really move as, i had gave two months deposit (500 bucks) and had done installing (forgot whats the word) a big table which is 30 kg!!! with the help of someone of course hehe... HAIX...

now i am regret of moving to that place... i should have move to other places which is much more cheaper, and of course, with STREAMYX!!!

i did not notice any notice looking for roommates before i move in... this is so f***ingly FAKE... haix... HOW COME!!!!!!!!! i am so pissed of... haix...

PISSED AND BORED... SIEN... HAIX...

anyone wanna sponsor me a computer? or monthly streamyx subscription fees? haix...

moving

well i am moving to wangsa maju tonight... and i will stay there...

that means i wont be able to online as frequently as last time d lah...

that place dont have any internet connection... everything also MONEY MONEY MONEY... haix... sien nia...

bored of that place before going in...

firt of all no pc or laptop... secondly no streamyx (not even dial-up connection!)... then no radio... not even bf... everything i need is NOT there...

=(

so how am i going to study long leh... haix... i think most probably i will quit schooling in tarc in this sem... so see loh...

cookie...

well just now about 8 or 9 plus i tried to bake cookies... hehe...

it had been a time since the last time i bake cookies... which i think is in january, at my cousin's place in brunei hehe... well i miss baking cookies haha...

so... i baked three 'tray's of cookies... and first tray a bit soft... then second and third tray ok :P haha... basically ok lah i am remembering the ways of making cookies and stuff again HAHA...

well wanna eat? :P though my cookies sucks haha...

haix unfortunately someone dont like butter cookie, which is my favourite and i just made that... haix...

discouraging day...

well today is totally discouraging for me... i dont know why but i was like kept on thinking bad things and stuff... haix...

in school... zainal left and went to unisel... poh soon was as cool as ever... no one wants to talk to me... haix... bored nia... i felt damn bored in school... and the worst thing is, i had my chemistry mock test and i cant even do one out of the seven questions... this is so damn discouraging for me... over the past 17 years i lived, this is the first time (i think) i will get 0% for a test... haix... SO DISCOURAGING!!!!!!!!!!!! sad...

today class supposed to go from 8 to 4... but i just stayed there until 1 plus and i left... too lazy and too discouraged to continue the 2 maths lecture classes by jessica and tanwb... jessica everyday give homework... her f***ing homework seems to be unfinished... and well, they are unfinished and unlimited... i tell you she will give about 10++ questions everytime after her lecture... 10++ maths question are not as easy as spm stuff... that one so short and easy to finish while stpm one SUCKS... omg i am so frustrated by her stupid homeworks... pass-up to her once and she just TICK and CIRCLE... not even a signature after all... :( so i decided not to do her stuff anymore... i dont care i am so discouraged by that... dont scold me or blame me for that but i am too SHIT by that...

then went home... bored... nothing to do... haix... BORED... life is so bored... somemore someone so busy no time for me... haix... :(...

long time no blog

haix... hehe... sorry that i long time no blog d... haha dunno what to talk loh...

well i went to penang last sunday til tuesday...

bought a 4pm ticket on saturday, and unfortunately i missed the bus (i reached there at 4.30... thanks to the f***ing traffic jam in kl [jam from 4 to 4.30 at masjid jamek there] SHIT!!!)... so i bought another ticket at 4.45 (the ticket lah) and the bus departed at 5... and it was heading to butterworth that means i have to take ferry to penang loh... haix... reached at about 10 plus... took a ferry which cost me RM 1.20 (last time only 60 cents)... pai-seh to have ken (my didi in penang) and his parents waiting so long for me... haha... sorry ya... then followed them home loh... then sleep loh haha...

monday morning woke up at 6 plus minus... then followed ken to his school... went to the canteen makan loh... then he went to his class while i heading to the library after my breakfast... so for your information i was in the library from 8.30 until 1.30 (WAIT FOR KEN LOH!)... luckily i brought along my maths t book or... haix... it was bored too anyway... haix...

anyway after that ken and i walked to penang road area and ate ais-kacang (red bean ice, or 'ang-dao-sherng' in hokkien)... he said it's his first time to eat there... haha... then went to prangin mall... walked for a while... then took a bus to his grandma's place... he bathed loh... his mom arrived with his clothings... then he changed and we makan... then his mom sent him to tuition and went to pay their old house's maintainance fees... then we went makan farlim laksa... which i missed for so long haha... then after that went to sunshine farlim to spend the one hour while waiting for ken... (his house is damn far so no point going back home as it take 30 minutes om his tuition centre to his place) then after bought a pack of 3 kg (or 5?) of dice brand washing powder... then met mary (my collegue in sri pelita)... knew from her that she wasnt working in sri pelita anymore... haix it seems that lots of ppl leaving sri pelita haha... then went to the pasar 'malam' ('night' market, though it was only 6 plus...) then went back to wait for ken loh... then after fetching him went to his grandma place for dinner.. then went to night market (another one) to buy eggs for his grandma... then went home loh... then tried to online but dunno why it cant on... haha... then asked sean to come and he did, then chit chat loh... then talked about many things haha... then slept loh...

tuesday morning... the same thing... followed him to school... then i went back to my school, sri pelita high school, by bus... as i have to attend the new south wales international competition for schools - mathematics assessment at 9.30am... then took the 1 hour paper... which i honestly, confident to get a certificate of high distinction, or at least a certificate of distinction... not i proud but really easy mah... i hope to get high distinction lah... hehe... then after the competition i went to the ministry of education for an interview conducted by the AFS (antarabudaya malaysia), which is about the student exchange programme (oh ya... i got chosen to go interview for student exchange to USA... but need to pass the interview first)... well honestly i dont think i will be chosen for that... haix... as i couldnt answer the question about the penang governor or whatever thing lah... haix... a bit disappointed... sad lah... then took bus to ken's place... then we went back home togather as he came to the bus station to walk me home (i dunno how mah)... then packed my stuff... and went to the bus terminal at sungai nibong... bought an immediate departing bus ticket, at 7.15... but eventually the bus departed at about 7.30... haha... then mah like that nia loh...

missing lots of ppl on my way back to kl... got ken lah... sean lah... his mom lah... someone lah... hehe... haix... hope to stay there longer one... but cant cause need to study so... haix...

anyway that was a good trip to penang haha...

SAD...

this is sad man... today is an unlucky day for me...

firstly i lost my locker key which i only have one set of it and i lost it! shit! haix... i cant access to my locker anymore :'(... cant find the key even after i walked around the school and the places i been to and the paths i walked through... haix why am i so bad luck one... :(

then as i said, i cant follow the a-level further mathematics classes... i was like so :(...

basically these two things had already 'kill' me half way through... haix... i felt like crying but cant cry as no one there to lend me a shoulder... i know those are some silly little problems but haix... just feel like crying lah...

any shoulder? sorry for being useless...

sad life.

so now i am able to be the boy sit down crying on the top left of this page...

this is cool man... for a sad guy like me leading a sad life like this and having a sad blog with 'sad guy' as its theme... SAD man...

haix... further maths class?

well just now, around 10.50 plus minus, i went to see mr ding, the further maths teacher for the a level students in my school... then i told him my wish to join the a level students in his further maths classes... then showed him the stpm further maths syllabus...

unfortunately, what he told me is that the syllabus arent really the same... so... haix... cham lah... from what he said, i dont think i can follow the classes... he said i will have to study by myself if i really want to take further maths in stpm... :(... haix...

somemore have some quarel (is that quarel or what?) with someone... so basically today i am down... feel like crying but no ppl here to support so cant cry lah... haix...

long time no blog...

hi guys... sorry kinda busy (its actually LAZY) lately... so dont really blog lah... hehe...

busy what? study lah... haix... i tell you ah stpm really sucks man...

well for your information i am now taking stpm at tar college... stpm is like a-level for malaysian...

err... beside ordinary biological science stpm core subjects, which are general paper (pengajian am), MUET (malaysian university english test), biology, chemistry and mathematics T (dunno technical mathematics or pure [tulen] mathematics... hehe...)... i decided to take another subject as an extra subject... which is 956 further mathematics t...

i got the permission from the school to follow the further mathematics classes with other A-Level students... which means, besides my stpm classes, i have to attend 6 or 7 hours' A-Level further mathematics classes per week...

i do have two interested extra subjects to take... which are further mathematics t and geography... hehe... i would like to take these two subjects in stpm but unfortunately, i can only take one... so... what i planned to do it... taking geography ALONE in stpm 2005 (this year) while take further mathematics t with other 5 subjects in stpm 2006... haha... sound weird huh? hehe... anyway i dont know whether i can still register for stpm this year one or not since i ask upper 6 ppl they said they registered early this year... haix... i hope i can still register for this one subject lah... hehe...

well guys pray for me :P haha... hope i can cope with my studies, my love and anything else at the same time lah...

for your information i am moving... move to a place which near my school and it will be much more easier for me to go to school, compared to spending 2 hours to get to school from my house in selayang by taking bus and lrt... haix... hehe...

well hope all the best to you guys lah ;) so see ya...

homosexuals - christian

Is homosexual really a sin? FOR CHRISTIANS!

by being a homosexual myself, i dont think that homosexuals is a sin.

ladies and gentleman, what makes you say that being homosexuals is sinful?

the bible said so? really?

one example from the bible... the NIV version of english bible used the word 'homosexual' huh? but another version used 'sexual perverts' woh... what mean? does it mean that sexual perverts (xing bian tai) are homosexuals? no this is definitely wrong. why say perverts are gays? (bian tai jiu shi 'gay' de ma?) if like that you christians are so stupid... hehe... honestly even a little kid also know perverts and homosexuals are different lah... be more knowledgable... think before you speak oh...

there are still lots of things from the bible... but sorry i too lazy to say it out one by one... you can look through all of them in the book 'Shen Ai Tong Zhi' by Ou Yang Zhen Feng. if possible, i would like to challange you guys to go get one book called 'Shen Ai Tong Zhi' (God Loves Homosexuals in chinese) at popular bookstore or others... this book is written by Ou Yang Zhen Feng, a Bachelor in Theology (Shen Xue Shuo Shi) who studied in oversea theological seminary for a few years... so i dont think there is any problem for someone who studied bible for so long to correct the mistakes that ppl had previously done in translating the old bible text (greek? or Latin?)...

Christians, go and get the book to read! i challange you if you think you are a reasonable christian. if it is really right that homosexual is a sin, then i bet you will know where it is and point it out clearly, by using the word and idea of God!

Christians nowadays have a very fatal mistake honestly... the correct attitude to study bible and learn about God's word is NOT 'read our idea into the bible', but read God's ideas from the bible and input them into our heart. means we will have to be open-minded to accept new things. am i right?

one important thing: i am not here to say that you christians are stupid or something like that... my message is, bring a humble heart when it comes to bible... always ready to accept new things... like last time ppl say female cannot go church or speak the word of God one... about the same case lah... unfortunately at this moment still got churches look down at females... this is totally wrong. i can say that firmly that is not what God want, AT ALL. God DONT WANT HIS PPL TO LOOK DOWN AT OTHERS AT ALL! so none of us have the right to look down at blind ppl (example lah) or homosexuals or deaf or whatever cacat it is...

do you think you can still enter the kingdom of God in heaven by being so 'good' to other people? looking down at them and expect yourself to enter the heaven... how rediculous... haha... think twice lah friend...

please, if you think you are right, after PRAYING and LOOK THROUGH the bible and LISTEN to GOD'S WORDS with a HUMBLE HEART, leave your message here at the tag board or email me at tonyqcc@hotmail.com or add me in msn...

i pray that more people will know about God's thoughts about homosexuals... if you think i am wrong, pray to God that He will talk to me and tell me directly that i am wrong or something. I pray that myself will be humble enough to learn about God's words and His teaching.

Please pray for everyone that you think is needed. May God bless all of you. Amen!

din go to school...

well i din attend my classes today... haix... i was doing my maths homework which ppl had done in the past month but i have to clear them up in one day... :S... i was doing it since sunday morning and continued for so long... of course with some breaks... i still cant finish them... haix... i was still doing that in the midnight... until about 4 or 5 plus i cant really stand so i took a nap and it became a sleep...and i woke up at about 9 to 10... i was lated for my class and that means i cant go anymore... haix... so what i can do is continue my work loh... haix... just took my lunch and online to blog this lah... hehe... so see ya guys...

sick

guys i am sick... soar throat plus fever and cough... haix... wish i will be fine soon lah...

had a 'fight' with someone yesterday night... haix... sad lah.

holiday

hereby i would like to declare for a holiday in making my blog...

first not much ppl come and see...
second busy nowadays as i need to study...
third something bad happened and screwed me up...

thank you guys (how many ppl will actually see this?)

second day in tar...

my second day... the scheduled first lesson (in my schedule lah) is biology lecture class, 12 at dk3... but when i got in there, i found that most of them are ppl i dont know... oops... something wrong maybe... then i saw that the timetable of a girl sitting in front of me is totally different with mine... means that class is not my class... haix... i dont know mah... baru second day... hehe... then quickly walked out of the hall and heading towards the pre-u building... wanted to check whats wrong or what happened or so...

when i got there, i went to the stpm section to check it first... then i realised that the timetable is being changed... haix... they changed it before the lady gave me the timetable... and she din tell me anything about the changes for the timetable so i just followed it blindly... so not systematic and not... whatever lah... bad system... haix... TAR ah TAR... need to change loh... haix...

then i was like so 'shit'... but anyway... '(forced to) never mind'... haix... jotted down all the changes for the timetable... then only i realised that my next class should be 2pm... :(... which means i will have extra two hours... haix...

then somemore tomorrow's GP is moved forward... from 11am to 9 am... then after that 9-10 class my next class is 12... which means i will be so damn bored as i have nothing to do in that two hours... i had already spent lots of my time in the library d... but why leh... haix... everyday go library later i become book-ku-phoboe [book-ku = buku loh...] how ah... haix... bored lah...

anyway... today's class ok lah... the chemistry practical not bad lah... it had been some time since my last contact with chemicals and laboratory tools... hehe... so got a bit kelam kabut (:S) loh... but basically no problem... hehe...

today's GP class got transferred to next monday (mr. othman told us this yesterday d...)... so i got only two hours class in school... which is from 2 to 4 only... then after that mah go home loh... hehe...

tomorrow going to buy books... hope i can get the books i want and book needed lah... so see ya...

first day studying in tar

today is my first day attending classes in TARC (Tunku Abdul Rahman College), as a pre-u stpm student. woke up at 8, finished preparing myself to school and followed my cousin, chia chin, to a bus stop near selayang mall, along with my brother who have to go to snips academy for his lesson, in her car.

arrived the bus stop at around 9, abroaded a no.50 metro bus and my brother paid 5 bucks (for himself and me)... i went down around masjid jamek at about 9.50, while my brother stayed on the bus, still. then i took putra lrt to taman melati station, which is near my school, and got there at about 10.30...

hang around my new school until 11, and went to block c, where the science laboratories are, for my ever first lesson, biology practical (lab work) in c205. after waited downstairs for about 15 minutes (i was there waiting for my classmates to enter the laboratory but no one did), saw everyone left... so i went to the office, wanted to complain (not complain lah but ask loh) at first, but i found that that fella, Chong SY, is absent... his/her (i dunno is he or she yet) class is 2 hours long... so at last, i ended up hanging around the school, which is so damn huge, until about 12.45 when terry contacted me and we said to meet in the canteen 1. while i was on my way there i met seah lim, my ex-classmate in penang... and i chatted with him for a while... hehe...

took my lunch and drinks while terry sat there doing nothing... after that we walked around the school until 2, when i have to attend my muet (malaysian university english test) class by Lau LY at h302... basically her class is 'okay' lah... but honestly i felt a bit bored... hehe... her class ended at 3 and i went to h201 for pure mathematics class by Khoo ES... bored at first, too... anyway she did talk to me and ask me to mix with the others... hehe... she is friendly ;)...

after that went to h203 for general paper (pengajian am) class by othman... have to copy stuff once i got into the class and 'settles' myself... haix... the whole page words... he is ok-ok also lah... not bad lah... haha...

generally ok lah the first day... hope it will be better tomorrow... hehe...

tar student...

mmm... today i went to tar again, to do the registration stuff and everything lah...

morning 10 plus departed... arrived at about 11 plus a bit... then went to get my offer letter and some letters and forms and whatever lah... i read and understand that i need to get quite a lot of things... bank draft for my first sem payment, photocopies of ic, offer letter, spm result slip and whatelse? hehe...

then rushed to jj [jaya jusco] area... as there are two banks, public and bumiputra commerce, around there... so went into bumi (public was DAMN crowded... much more crowded than bumi) myself, queued for half an hour then only i realised that i have to fill the bank-draft form (i wanted to buy bank draft for payment) and enclose a piece of photocopied ic... so i was frustrated and i went to the shop beside it to photocopy my ic and also some official stuff which will be needed later... walked to a photo centre and took 4 pieces of passport sized picture of myself... then walked back to bumi again... again, queued for half an hour...

then got everything done around 1... then decided to go into jj for some food... as the bursary office [payment one] is closed at 12 and reopened at 2.15... so makan and jalan... went to tar and arrived at about 2 plus...

straight away went to the bursary department to pay my stuff... then back to the pre-u office to register... then asked my future housemate to go outside the office so that i can pass him the 2-month deposit... then go inside see the head of the SPUS [School of Pre-University Studies] so that i can get a class... and my class is LS2b... hehe... then got the time table and everything...

went to library... which is so damn far away and i almost got LOST :S... haix... then again, queued and realised that i have to fill the form... so sad... then filled the form, submitted it, and went back... it was about 4 plus when i got home... haix...

well i am going to start schooling tomorrow... hehe... so wish me good luck lah...

today me.

today...

- went to register in tar as a stpm student...
- looked for rooms to let and stuff...
- went for mr and mrs smith at tgv klcc...
- bought 4 books in kinokuniya... they are Resident Evil Zero Hour, Resident Evil Nemesis, Resident Evil Genesis PAP (movie book) and Fantastic 4 PAP...
- had a quarrel with someone...

tomorrow [plan]...

- go to mid valley for maybe a practice for the short film, Aman...

only this at this moment...

FW: Benefits of being a Gay...

FW: Benefits of being a Gay. [Chinese]

Translated...

I used to think that it is bad for me myself for being a gay, but i am arrogant now!
1. Normally, gays are more artistic than the others!
2. Gays have more unique 'savoring'! Like in pop music and so on!
3. Gays are much more easier to mix with, compared to those who likes to act 'cool'! Also likes helping the others!
4. Gays* speaks the principle more too! Take Glistens Three Sisters as an example, they always being scolded by those heterosexuals, but i do think that this group is diligently lovable! *in this point it should be 'Homosexuals'...
5. Gays are charming~ And always are heterosexuals' best buddies...
6. Gays really have lots of merits! But i believed that people who replies will take about 'sex'!
7. Quite a number of high-post workers is gay!

p.s. sorry that i cant translate very well... hehe... so there are quite some grammatical mistakes... pai-seh hah...

i love you...

for someone...

i love you
i love you
i love you
i love you
i love you

il ove you
i love you
il love you
i love you
i lvoe you

i love you
i loove you
i love you
i loveyou
i love you

i love you
i love you
i love you
i love you
i love you


observations...
1. there are 20 'i love you's...
2. first 5 are perfectly spelled...
3. for second 5, there are 3 with spelling mistakes and 2 perfect ones...
3a. 2 mistakes for 'i'...
3b. 1 mistake for 'love'...
4. for third 5, there are 2 with spelling mistakes and 3 perfect ones...
4a. 1 mistake for 'love'...
4b. 1 mistake for both 'love' and 'you'...
5. last 5 are perfectly spelled...
6. in total there are 5 mistakes...
6a. 2 mistakes for 'i'...
6b. 2 1/2 mistakes for 'love'...
6c. 1/2 mistake for 'you'...

meanings...
1. take the 20 'i love you's as all my love... [use it for percentage thingy lah]
2. lovers' love are always perfect at first...
3. 60% (3 out of 5) of the loves seems to have problems...
3a. 2 problems from me...
3b. 1 problem for love...
4. 40% (2 out of 5) of the loves [dropped from 60% to 40%!] seems to have problems...
4a. 1 problem for love...
4b. 1/2 problem for both love and you...
5. anyway, when it came to the last 5, the loves are perfect...
6. in total there is 25% (5 out of 20) of the love with problems...
6a. 2 problems from me...
6b. 2 1/2 problems for love...
6c. 1/2 problem from you...

deeper meanings...
the love at the beginning of our relationship looks good all the time... but as we go deeper and deeper, problems and stuff occurs... most of the problems are start from me myself and not much of them are caused by you... anyway, true [perfect] love is always there... though problems seems to occur, true love is still there... and lastly, the loves are perfect...



someone, i love you...

Like and Love...

Like and Love are different...


1A You may like something someone did but not love him.

1B You may love someone but dislike something he did.


2Ai Like is only a small part of love while love involves the whole person.

2Aii You like someone's this little thingy and dislike the other little thingy.

2Aiii You choose which one to like and which one to dislike.

2Bi When you love someone, you will love the whole person as he was, he is and how he would be.

2Bii You will try to accept his bad things or behaviors.

2Biii You will learn to forgive and take things easy.


3A You like to do happy things with someone you like when you are in good mood.

3B You want the one you love to be with you no matter what you do, in any mood.


4A You are willing to help the one you likve, to a certain extend.

4B You are willing to sacrifice for your love ones, no matter what are the consequences or what would happen to the others, as long as you think he would lead a better life.



Tony Quah
04.38.09
2005.05.31

me.

i am Tony Quah Chin Chew...
for me, that is my identity...

i hate it when the others modify and laugh at my name...
for me, that is like insulting me and the one who gave me this name...

i am systematic and i wish to have a personal space...
for me, that is where i can release myself...

i hate that i dont have my own room in my own's place...
for me, that is like staying in other people's house...

i am a homosexual...
for me, this is me...

i hate that there are so many homophobics and treat homos as gross...
for me, this is worse than insulting me as that insults every homos...

i am artistic and i love music and performing arts very much...
for me, they are my daily core activities...

i hate it when the others kept on telling me how useless performing arts are...
for me, performing arts are my life...

i love my friends and i trust them a lot...
for me, that is how i hope the others will treat me...

i hate it when i treat my friends sincerely while they still take advantages on me...
for me, this is like stabbing me in the back...

i always try to treat everyone as cheerful and kind as possible...
for me, that is the best thing i can do...

i hate it when i was greeting someone while the opponent treat me like nothing...
for me, this is like throwing a pancake onto my face...

i am those kind of person who hate to be forced to do things i dislike or hate...
for me, this is so simple and true...

i hate it when i was having my free time after teaching, they asked me to replace another class...
for me, this is like working without paid...

i have the one i love, and i will continue on loving him...
for me, this is true love...

i hate it when i dont love one person, he asked me to try to love him or try to build the 'feel'...
for me, this is like insulting 'love', as this is not true love...

this is me...
for me, i am me myself...

no fake, no act...
i am Tony Quah...

Choral camp...

i wasnt online for quite some days... 5 day in a row... haha... from 1st June to 5th June... haix... got camp mah... haha...

well it was a choral (choir) camp... the 3rd Young Singer Choral Festival 2005... with the theme 'Sing Out! Sing Strong!'... at YMCA, Brickfields in KL... hehe... not many ppl know i joined choir before... and i seldom tell people about this too... last time one mah... and somemore not much archievement... so... haha...

anyway i am always a bass singer... bass is a male singing voice of the lowest range... means the voice very low one loh... haha...

well honestly din really make friends there except my three roommates jeremy, dennis and ryner... haix... three of them not only in the same class (form 2... ppl 14 nia so a bit childish gua... hehe... dunno lah...)... same church... same choir too... haha... by the way they are from smk batu lintang, sarawak... haha... jeremy an introvert... dennis half-half... while ryner is so damn extro man... :S... mulut like m16 leh... hehe... fast and lots of words... haha...

there are quite some students from penang schools like mgs lah... st georges lah... cpt lah... convent light street lah... [now i fully agree that the convent girls are like shit... trust me... all proud proud one... haha... kanasai nia... somemore not beautiful but act like 'queen' haha...] convent green lane lah... peng hua lah... chung ling butterworth lah... and my school SRI PELITA (though i am the only one representing my school... then somemore i am a former sri pelitan...) haha... got smk ibrahim from kedah... smk hamid khan from tapah, perak... smk assunta, smk seafield, and smk subang jaya from selangor... smk batu lintang from kuching, sarawak... alice smith international school from kl... malaysian institute of arts, music department and both the kl children's choir and the young kl singers... so in totalk there are 18 schools and 153 (plus minus) participants, including those individual participants...

the founders and directors of this camp is Susanna Saw and Mak Chi Hoe... then we have two guest tutors, Martin Nagashima Toft from Denmark, and Marcus La Pratt from USA... festival pianist Geneviene Wong Jen-Pei... then we have guest choirs too... six2eight, the dithyrambic singers and the wicked pitches from kl... and singapore choirs (Nanyang Girls' High School Choir, Hwa Chong Junior College Choir and Hwa Chong Voices) from Singapore...

the first day we did nothing... as the registration begins at 11am and dinner at 6.30 then opening concert, ice-breaking and choral section at 7.30 until 10 plus...

the second day... breakfast at 7... warm-up session led by marcus from 8.30 to 9.30, then choral session til 11, 15 minutes break, Western Music I by martin until 12, then a basic conduction session from 12 to 12.30, then one hour lunch, then British Choral Music I by Dr Marc Rochester from UK for 1.30 to 2.30, masterclass by martin with individual lessons by marcus until 4, American Music I by marcus until 4.45, free until 6.30, dinner until 7.30, then concert by six2eight and choral session until 10...

the third day... basically the same thing lah... breakfast at 7... warm-up session led by martin from 8.30 to 9.30, then choral session til 10.45, Western Music II by martin until 11.30, break until 12, then lunchtime concert by dithyrambic singers from 12 to 12.30, then one hour lunch, then British Choral Music II for 1.30 to 2.30, masterclass by marcus with individual lessons by martin until 4, American Music II by marcus until 4.45, free until 6.30, dinner until 7.30, then a choral session until 10...

the fourth day... lots of free time... haha... breakfast from 7 to 8.30, then free time from 8.30 onwards until 2.30... 6 HOURS FREE TIME... haix... then concert by singapore choirs from 2.30 until 4.45, choral session until 6.30 then dinner from 6.30 to 7.30, then choral session again until 10 and forum until 11...

the last day... 7 to 8.30 breakfast, warm-up session led by chi hoe until 9.30 then choral session until 11.30... half an hour break then lunchtime concert by the wicked pitches until 12.30, one hour lunch break, choral session from 1.30 to 2.30, then preparation for concert from 2.30 until 4... the concert starts at 4 and ends at 5.45... then went home loh... haha...

the festival participants actually only sing 9 songs together... excluding 5 songs the three schools (2 by smk ibrahim, 1 by smk batu lintang and 2 by smk seafield)... then got guest choirs too... over all dont know how many songs sung lah... haha...

the 9 songs are a song for you, hello, the guitar man, a native american prayer, dynamic without score, hands, joshua fit de battle ob jericho and aloha 'oe... like that nia lah... haha... i like all the songs... haha...

a meet with SOMEONE and eric...

well today, i met with SOMEONE (FINALLY!!!) and eric at time square...

mmm... originally, i am going to meet with both eric and ah khong one... then i thought of inviting joe too... so i asked him to join us loh... hehe... he wasnt want to go at first one... then i try to 'persuade' him to join us... and finally he agree to come... haha...

the night before it, joe and i said that we shall meet at 12 noon... while eric, ah khong and i met at 1... hehe... then ok loh.. meet at 12 loh... haha...

let's see... if i need to arrive time square (ts) at 12, i need to take a bus at 9 plus (so that i arrive kl area at 11, and then lrt and monorial to ts and arrive at 12)... then i woke up at 8 [i slept in 2 last night!!!], took a bathe and things, got myself and everything ready, and went out to the bus station at 9.05... then luckily, a bus came while i was on my way to the bus station so i just abroaded loh... hehe... then, dont know why, today no traffic jam and stuff, and i arrived in kl at 9.45... haha... as it's so damn early, and joe cant be that early, so i decided to take putra lrt (the underground one), from my station (masjid jamed) to somewhere far and change station in those cross-stations (like klcc lah... dang wangi lah... and others lah...) and then back to my destination (dang wangi) again... so it was like making a BIG U-TURN... haha... well... in short, i took lrt at masjid jamed, and went to setiawangsa station, and then took the opposite lrt back to dang wangi... by the way, masjid jamed and dang wangi is only one station away, which will, mostly, take 10 minutes... hehe... but i spent about 45 minutes, which means i arrived dang wangi, after a big turn, at 10.30... hehe... still too early, but better than arrive there at 10... at 10.30 i took kl monorail, from bukit nanas area to bukit bintang, which is around sungai wang and time square there... and got there at about 10.50...

walked from bukit bintang station to ts, i arrived at 11... then i went to borders, the bookstore in the first floor and wait for joe while reading books... well i met joe at about 11.30... then walk-walk-walk and ah khong sms me and told me that he cant join us as his sister is involved in an accident... well hope that she will be ok... lastly we decided to go to the food court on the 10th floor... it was about 12.30 liao loh... well he took a plate of stewed yee-mee and a can of coke light, while again, i took nothing, due to my damn stomach... (well the history repeats!)

and then at about 12.45, eric arrived and joined us (him) in having dinner... well... after seeing one ppl eating his food, here came the second one... AHH... eri ordered a plate of pineapple fried-rice (should be lah) and a cup of orange juice... hehe... then ate and went off at about 1 plus...

mmm... then go walk-walk-walk (again!) around the ts building... hehe... went to the arcade centre, as eric wanted to bashing again, but unfortunately the bashing machine is BROKEN!!! which is so damn SHIT for eric :p haha... he said he wanted to get 121 pts again... but well... the machine is down... so... got nothing at last... :S...

then go walk-walk-walk and then went to gsc (golden screen cinema) counter to buy movie tickets... well this is really :S (AHH!!!)... as... well, i wanted to see infection, eric wanted to see house of wax, while joe wanted to see one missed call 2... :S... well... i booked quite some tickets three days ago... which are:

one missed call 2,
2.00pm *3 and *4;
4.10pm *2+*2 and *3.

infection,
3.20pm *3 and *4.

house of wax,
TRIED TO BOOK BUT UNFORTUNATELY, NO TICKET LEFT AT ALL... :S...

well... when its about to be our turn, there are 3 tickets left for house of wax at 2.00... so eric thought 'oh, three tickets ngam ngam...' but it turned out to be separated... means they are in three different places... :S... so... haix... bought 3 tickets for the movie one missed call 2, at 2.00... haix... then joe got some popcorn and drinks while eric bought himself a cup of soft drinks... me? got nothing :P... then movie loh... then finished d loh... haha...

well honestly the movie isnt very nice... i mean for me lah... hehe... i dont really like the movie... so... haix... i was thinking like 'SHIT!!! MY 30 BUCKS WASTED...' as i pay for all the three tickets, and each one of them cost 10 bucks... somemore the theater hall is so small... haix...

then eric and i went to starbucks for some drinks while joe left us for his friend (well he thought he would be going home after leaving but he spent some time with his friend who worked there)... we chit-chat loh... from 4 to 5 plus about 6... haha... just talk cock there lah... hehe... then went home d loh... haix...

i was originally going to terry's place to help him moving but unfortunately my parents dont allow so went home loh...

walked from time square to sungai wang there... then when i got there, the bus no. 50 was there d so i went up loh... hehe... then reached home at about 7 plus a bit... that's all lah... haha...

mmm... well honestly not very happy...

first of all, movie... second of all, something i thought should be happening turned to be nothing at all... haix... whatever...

replying a message in xfresh...

well guys i posted a message in xfresh forum site... about 2 years ago... 2003 loh... its about homosexuality... so i would liek you guys to go take a look... hehe... thanks a lot...

you can get to the forum directly by clicking here...

or... if you want to go there manually... go to www.xfresh.com first, then click at the 'entertainment' side (the first one on the top)... then go to forum {or interact} (right corner there)... then 'fashion: guys'... then the topic is 'gay & lesbian' (which you should be able to locate it in the first page or second one)... well actually you can just click on the link up there one... or click here lah...

oh man i am so stupid :P haha... enjoy it ;)

changes to my site...

well guys i bet all of you know that there are lots of changes in my site... hehe... especially the layout... i really hope you will like it... cause i really like it... very very much... hehe...

mmm... my new blogsite work best on 1024*768 pixels (the screen resolution loh)... and please spend some time to tag over the tag-board [you need to scroll right a bit if your screen resolution is set to 800*600 pixels]...

i just spent lots of energy to the song section [below the tagboard... scroll to bottom-right]... hehe... guess what... for someoen who dont really know about those html codes thingy [ME LAH!!!]... it's really hard... but well i managed to get that done [hebat leh... hehe]... so tolong tolong support a bit :P... haha...

well tag it in the tagboard if you do have any comment... or you dont have any comment... or you want to tell me something... or you just want to write something... haiya whatever lah... hehe...

thanks for coming!!! i love you all!!!

today me...

my cousin, chia mean, came to kl, with his family (his wife wnd both of their sons, amos and benjamin), two days ago (25th may)... they are going to genting highland for a church camp on 28th so came earlier to tour around kl first loh... hehe...

well... as they arrived in the night time (around 9 plus...), so as soon as they got here, they ''unequiped" all their bags and "equipments" for the babies... hehe... then after that... sleep loh... habo then(means, if not then)? haha...

the second day... woke up at 11 plus to 12... hehe... then forgot do what d... until dont know what time, my cousin they all went to ikea... window-shopping... :P... haha... then i still remember i sms someone... apologised and told him that i will try to be back the tony i used to be... and asked him to wait and see... hehe... well... :)

the third day... which is yesterday (27th may)... in the morning, about 9 plus, my cousin woke me up (well he said he was going to do so since the night before)... and brought me to the pasar pagi (morning market) nearby and asked me to go ta-pao (pack) some food... so... pack some tai-lok-min (mee kasar... rough noodles...) for them and two packs of herbal tea for myself... then go to the market section to buy some chinese herbal... wanted to pou-leong-cha (cook herbal tea)... hehe... then went home loh... then all ppl go mandi (bath) and makan (eat)... then about 11, we bertolak (departed) to IKEA!!!

we arrived ikea at about 11.20... following the kepong road to PJ Damansara high way... then arrived d... go 'shopping' loh... hehe... mmm... from 11.30 walk walk walk until 3 plus... haix... so long hoh... hehe... when we finished touring the second floor (the show rooms' floor), went to the restaurant and ordered a set of kids' meal (4 chicken nuggets and some french fries) for amos, a little can of baby food for benjamin and i got myself a cup of free coffee/tea (got the coupon mah)... then i had a cup of cuppucchino (dunno how to spell lah) and another cup of espresso... then went downstairs, i got amos into the child-care thingy... but unfortunately, he went in for less than i think 10 minutes and he cried for me (wanted to leave or want me to go inside accompanying him gua)... haix... then at first, i talked to the friendly ikea child-care centre guy... hoped that he can let me in for just a while... then he talked to his supervisor and they agreed to let me in for a while lah... so i went in, took amos to the other section (he just stayed at the arts corner and drawed just now... so took him to the playground section lah)... unfortunately he seemed didnt want to stay in there anymore... so i just took him out with me loh... haix... then got his parents and paid for the things they bought (approximately RM 100...), and left loh...

then we left and went to the burger king restaurant... ordered three sets of fast-food (got burger and french fries or star-shaped potato and drinks)... and firstly, chia mean and i makan (eat) our food while min hui (his wife) was taking care of both of them in the playground... then we makan and minum (eat and drink)... when we finished our food, went inside the playground and its our turn to take care of them... hehe... well as the drinks there can be refill freely... i myself got three large cups of vanilla coke... my cousin and his wife got 3 cups of regular sprite and 2 cups of regular f&n grape and another regular cup of vanilla coke... hehe... then we went home at about 4 to 5...

then got home loh... i online for a little short while... din see someone... so off soon... haix... quite disappointed when i din see him... anyway i was just trying and hoping to meet him and chat with him... hehe...

so after a while, went to one-utama (1-U), with them (again) and my cousin (his sister chia chin) and my aunt (their mom)... hehe... went there to meet someone... then bla bla bla (sorry but dont know what to write lah... you know lah... go shopping mall... jalan jalan... makan makan... main main... [means, walk-walk... eat-eat... play-play...] hehe...)

then at about 9 plus to 10, as it is going to close, we walked to the car park loh... then on our way there, we passed by a place for ppl to climb (the mountain climbing one)... then i got a bit hand itchy and i climbed up the 'mountain', without any safety belt or ppl's help... hehe... well honestly it was the first time i climb this kind of mountain... haha... but wel i can climb up leh... though not up to the top but quite high also... hehe... i myself was also surprise leh... haha... kinda proud of it :P...

then got home and online and blog (this blog lah!) loh... in the same time i chat with someone too... happily and sadly and curiously and guiltly and whatever-ly lah... hehe...

i was being pessimistic?

well guys... i dont know why i was very moody and very pessimistic in the past few days... not much of you could realise that... haha...

well.. hereby i would like to apologise to someone, who i had been so rude and bad and really bad to him... i am very sorry...

i dont know why i was being so weird... i really dont know... maybe i was confused about my couples' thingys... you see... it was about someone and stan at first, then when i was about to get okay, then suddenly alex came in too... oh my god i was really confused and i was about to broke down at that time...

it had been really hard and really tough for me... well i know this is my personal stuff so i didnt really talk to anyone about it... i was hurt... badly hurt... alex... stan... someone... honestly i was suffering...

haha... well anyway... if really go and see... all those confusions and broke downs are caused by myself... some stupid thoughts... some really stupid and useless mindcepts... some so-called 'responsibilities'... some left-over feelings... haix... haha...

i am such a stupid guy... i said so bah right? i told you that bah right? it would be very very hard to be my boyfriend... even you are not my boyfriend yet i know... but dont you think it's hard, even just to be my friend? haha... well i felt that... i felt that it wasnt fair to you... no fair for you to stand so much pressures from me... just because of my stupid thoughts and things i caused pressures to you and made you harder... i am sorry for this... right someone?

well that's why i was like repeating how stupid i am... how weird i am... how weak i am... how petty i am... how raring i am... haix... again, i am stupid huh? haha... i am doing too much... over-act... stupid acts...

pessimistic? yes i think so... haha...

oh...

well... i realised that i started to like those rock and techno songs... :S... oh my god how come... hehe... i think if really go and listen, the music of those songs, are quite nice and special...

mmm... well i listen to songs in a slightly special way (i think lah...)... how to say ah... okay for example, i listen to a song. then for the first time i will listen to the whole song, the whole of it... then i will some sort like 'analyse' the song thoroughly... hehe... then i will listen to the 'background' part music of the song... hehe... sound weird huh? hehe well i am a weirdo i know :P...

recently i listened to songs from a group called Groove Coverage... most of the songs are rock and techno... but if you really listen to the song they are quite nice... really trust me... the songs i like are moonlight shadow (i prefer the piano version), poison, god is a girl (i like the piano solo part so much!), runaway, the end (both album version and Special D Remix version), remember, last unicorn, little june, and far away from home... guys go try to listen and see lah... not bad leh... hehe...

catching chords...

in this lovely morning, i found and downloaded a windows media player plugin from the wmp plugin site... it is a media detector (i dont know what is the right name for it...) called MuseOn Detector... haha... quite happy to obtain that thing... although it's a two-week trialware... but better than none lah... haha...

well i always want to catch the chords for the song 'Mama' by Spice Girls... but honestly both my listening and guitar skill arent good (worse than beginner... hehe...)... so... hehe... but i couldnt find them in the internet too... :S...

now got a little bit lah... but err... i dont think is very accurate lah... so now i need to get a guitar and test out the chords detected... hehe...

well hope someone can sponsor me a guitar or so... hehe... so see ya...

something sad came to me...

mmm... well just now, which is about 6 plus, my ever first ex alex, suddenly came to me in msn...

the first thing he said is 'hmm...miss you...'

i was like :O and :@ then i replied with 'why leh? why miss me?'... well i was really angry that he dump me at first and yet he still dare to say that he miss me... what the hell...

maybe he knew that i was angry and frustrated then he said 'nothing... bye'

...

i asked him 'how are you?' and he replied 'terible'... i dont know why i asked him that... my heart went soft? i dont know... i really dont know... this is so... confusing? frustrating? sad? or whatever...

'what happened?' i asked again...

in 24 seconds' time, he asked me back 'do u noe y i wanna broke up wif u...?'

'you just went disappear' i said. and he explained 'actually...my family...'. 'they knew it?'

'yup...' he said and i asked him 'then?'

'i said i'm not..n find a gf'

'and? then?'

'now they move out dee.'

'tell me the whole thing' i said... i wanted to know what happened... i was curious... i wanted to know why would he treated me like that... i wanted to know everything...

he replied with a simple answer 'ok'

'now tell me what happened'

'wat u wanna noe?'

'everything'

'wat?'

'what happened from the time when they found you up until now'

well he said 'a lotz happens...i'm tired to sad...'

'you know another guy?' i asked.

'how dare?'

'have sex with anyone?'

' -.-""" '

'why not?'

'i said i found a gf. not a bf'

'then tell me lah. why arent you contacting me at all' this is the thing that i wanted to ask him for so long... since the day he dumped me...

' i dun wan to '*tuo ni xia shui' ' *tuo ni xia shui in chinese, means 'drag you into the water'*

he continued 'thay said wanna find out my bf that time'

'then?'

'so i stop contact u' well honestly this is a lame reason... i couldnt really accept this...

i continued to ask him 'handphone? why din bother to contact or at least a sms?'

and his answer was, 'that time i make a decision to be a straight guy ( a childish minded)'

'you tell me the whole thing lah... then what happened and whats next and stuff... i wanna know'

'u can find me at pragin. i work here everyday' he said.

'tell me through here'

'nope' he denied... as he said, 'hard to say'

'i want you to say it' i insisted, firmly 'here'

he thought for a while 'hmm...' and said 'i told u i'm bi rite?'

'fine then' wanted him to continue...

'however... i find a girl that time... n always bring her to house... to show my family that i'm straight... n i stop think bout queer things... n not contatc u at all...'

'tahtz all...' he ended.

'then?' i wanted to know more! MORE!

'now you a straight? congratulation' i teasingly asked him...

' -.-"""... thatz not possible' he replied.

'why not? since you always bring a girl home. well most probably you had sex with her too. haha.' was i being jealous? or frustrated?

'just acting k..?' he explained.

'then? now leh?'

'stay alone. working n studying... like this lo'

'what you want to tell me?' i asked him.

'just wan u to noe the truth. dun misunderstanding'

being sarcastic (is it?), i asked him 'you love me still?'

and he asked me back 'r u?'

not wanting to answer him straight, i said 'i am asking you'

'i dunno...coz now i'm just consentrat on my study n work' he replied.

'haha ok lah. study well.' being dont know what feeling, i said to him 'bye'

'bye' he said that to me too...

and well, the conversation ended.

...

well this is like writing a novel... haha... except that this 'novel' is based on what we really talked in msn just now... trust me... no 'faking stories'...

...

any comment?

sunday... what i did?

well on sunday (22nd May)... i met with two of my net friends... ah khong and eric...

mmm... the time we supposed to meet is 12... at times square... but unfortunately, eric was late (he got there at 12.30... but still, he was the earliest... hehe...), then i was late (i arrived at 1 plus leh... :S)... and ah khong was even later (he arrived at 2 plus leh...) so... hehe... sorry for not punctual at all...

anyway, when eric got there, he went to the arcade centre for some bashing (punching) games... i dont know how many rounds he played (he didnt tell me and i didnt ask mah)... but what i know is he waited there for approximately one hour... so sorry for that eric... hehe...

well when i arrived, we went to starbucks and have our drinks... he was having (should be) a cup of iced tea while i got my venti espresso frappuchino... hehe... my favourite drinks... so now you guys know what to buy for me when we got to starbucks... hehe... just kidding... so in the one hour, while waiting for ah khong to be there from cheras (if i had no mistaken), we chat a lot... hehe... chat about his school mates... his so-called 'problem'... well we talked a lot lah... quite nice also... *message to SOMEONE: pls dont jealous or anything cause we just CHAT about NORMAL thingys and NOT LOVE... so... :P

well we chat in english... then when ah khong arrived, he was first sitting there and so-called listening to our conversation (actually he didnt listen but sms leh...)... hehe... i realised that he didnt 'mix' with us so i eye-hint eric... hehe... then dunno how we slowly 'pulled' him into our conversation... hehe... so finally he talked too (though only a bit a bit... better than none bah right? :P)... so after that we went to arcade again... as eric requested...

so we went the arcade centre loh... and when we got there... we walked around the arcade centre and watching some people dancing and bashing... then eric's hand itchy and went to bash the things again... hehe... he told us his highest record is 121 lbs. (what is the units for that thing again?) so hebat... as normally people can get only to about 100... :S... well then he bashed the things for a few times... walau man he was crazy he can bash until his hand lebam (blue-black) and got his last two fingers (right hand lah) bleed... :S... i told him if he was my boyfriend, not only his finger will bleed but both sides of his face will also be bleeding (slapped by me... hehe...) then my hand also itchy then i changed 3 bucks token and played the shooting game... times crisis 3... 3 token per turn... and i played only one turn... because the gun is actually a little bit broken... REALLY ONE!!! TRUST ME!!! the gun is broken-broken... that's why i cant really shoot... ha-bo? well i was dead (in the game lah!) in just a few minutes :S... well after one credit i turned away with them loh... hehe... pai-seh leh... a while die d... :S...

then we walked out a little bit... ah khong (a great fans of JOLIN) was attracted by jolin's poster then he went to the stall to see... then he bought a huge hanging poster of her and he got a poster of her for free... hehe... dont know how much is that huge hanging poster lah but i dont think it's cheap... hehe...

then went up to third or fouth floor... got the thai exhibition thingy... so we stopped there (i asked for!) and i wanted to buy chopsticks (again... hehe...) but didnt buy any cause no money (actually is the design lah... ok-ok only...) so... walked away again...

after that, went to the food court in times square at 10th floor... then they ordered their own food (no one ordered for me!) and i didnt have any apetite to eat as my stomach ulcer thingy so cant really eat... then after they finished their food we chat again... then suddenly my mi called me and asked me where i am and stuff... then she acted like i am wrong for going out with PLUs and stuff... so i got very frustrated and shut her call and i shut my phone too... then dont know chat until what time lah (but not late leh... the sky is still bright... haha...) ah khong said he wanted to go d as he afraid later no bus go back to kota raya (pudu there loh...)... but well actually the bus is until late at 10 plus one mah... haha... and the time is not yet 6 or 7... hehe... anyway he insisted on going back so we all went back loh...

eric took monorail to kl sentral and then lrt to wangsa maju... then ah khong took a bus from the sungai wang there (in front of McDonald there... but i dont know what name...) to kota raya then dont know take what bus back home or do what... then i went to packed some chu-cheong-fan behind the sungai wang building and went to the same place where ah khong was for a bus home (metro bus no. 50)... while waiting i opened my phone again... and i got a message from my cousin... she asked me to call her back as she wanted to bring me to ikea for a wardrobe... oh shit about the wardrobe... i dont have one at my OWN PLACE!!! thats why i dont like to stay in kl lah... i dont feel like this is my house... i dont have anythign that belongs to me at all... i dont have an own room... dont have a personal wardrobe or at least a cupboard... but unfortunately there isnt any one... so shit man...

so i called them and took a bus home which i arrived at about 8 plus... SOMEONE sms me and asked me about my meeting with eric and ah khong... (wah!!! so nice to get sms from him... well he damn busy one... got exam and stuff so seldom sms me... hehe...) so i replied him and he sms again... i replied again... but unfortunately i felt asleep (i was damn tired...) so... :S... sorry SOMEONE...

i got home, went to ikea with my cousin and his boyfriend... chose a nice and cheap wardrobe... plus some accesories which i think will be needed and will be helpful for me... then we took the things, happily and steadily, heading to the place where the packed wardrobe was, and SHIT! the packed wardrobe is too long... 180 cm... and it is kinda impossible for us to stuck it into a proton wira... so... :(... forced to leave all the things alone... and well, i dont have anything at last... this is really 'yi chang HUAN XI yi chang KONG' (means, first i was very happy that i got to buy a wardrobe for myself... ironically[can i use this?] and dramatically, nothing could be bought at last...)... so disappointed... :(...

well then went to an indian nasi kandar restaurant at tesco which was just beside ikea... my cousin and i took nasi kandar which cost us RM7.50 each and her boyfriend took a tosai which was only RM1.50... and well i was like 'what the hell... a plate of briyani rice with some vege and a piece of chicken plus some free (should be free...) kua-campur (mixed curry sause) cost me 7 bucks... shit lah...' well for rich people this is nothing but for me, who is so poor and kedekut (honestly i am... :P), this is so damn expensive... haix... then somemore not very nice nia... so... i was like so :@... haix...

then they went to buy 'one missed call 2' vcd (pirated :P) from the dunno what name food-court at kepong there and we went home...

this was what i did for the whole day long... haha... (wow... i think this is the ever first time i give so many details leh... hehe... and wah... i spent about one hour in this post leh... haha...)

me... this moment...

20 may...
today... terry's birthday... and i have to go to OCBC bank for an interview section...

went to KLCC around 1.00... accompany terry go cari kerja... but unfortunately... he cant really get one yet... so... :S... hehe...

well then i went to OCBC at 3... while he stayed in the Burger King restaurant... eating and drinking unlimited and refillable soft drinks (i bet he kept on drinking vanilla coke... as the drinks available are coke, vanilla coke, f&n grape and sprite...)... hehe... so i went up at 3... waited until 4... then ms. audrey wong interviewed me... i was kinda nervous but luckily everything went fine... hehe... until around 4.30 went down and find terry... then go to sungai wang... i wait fo my brother from snips academy (he will be off at 6)... so... go there walk walk loh... while terry went to 'forgot what name' shop to find job... filled up a form... then now wait loh... hehe...

walau... i dont know i went there for how many times in the past few weeks d loh... :S... so at 6, got my brother and his friend, and went home loh... i was so damn tired that i felt asleep even in the damn stuffy and crowded bus... haix... then got home at about 8.20... then went for a bathe straight away as i was sweating so much... haix cant tahan leh... hehe... so after that sleep until dunno 11 or 12 plus a bit... then online loh... :S... then sleep loh... HAHA...

21 may...
today got an audition.. at wisma igb... beside mid valley... for AMAN movie... a charity short film thingy... not audition actually but explaination and understanding the film lah...

terry din get a job yet... so... came along loh... hope to find a job here... went to mph bookstore but they ask him to go again at next tuesday... then went to philosophy men... filled up the form and stuff... then the lady told him that maybe they will get him in july...

basically like that nia lah... nothing much to write leh... hehe... nothing much happened mah... :P...

well for tomorrow, which is 22 may, i will go to times square to meet two of my net friends, eric and ah khong... hehe... well see first lah... ;)

current situation...

my life... at this moment.. is bored... :S... too free... nothing much for me to do... in my place... got a television... a computer with streamyx (broadband connection service in malaysia)... PS 2 (but the damn chew chai took it into his room and play all by himself only... shit...)... so basically i cant do much things... as no PS 2... and i seldom watch television... :S... so... left only computer loh... haha... so, as a result, i ended up playing computer almost 48 hours per day... so kena complain loh.. haha...

i asked them what can i do... they say can hang out with friends... but i wasnt in kl and i was in penang for the past 5 years... so how am i going to have some friends over here leh... haix... susah (means hard, difficult) lah...

i wished that there is a piano... a printer and a musical program in my computer called Cakewalk Express Gold... if i have all there three things... i can do lots of things loh... haha...

first, i am going to use the Cakewalk to 'read' the midis... then edit... and then print the scores out... and play... haha... well this seems to be easy but actually not really. you know lah... midi got quite some instruments one mah... so not easy (not hard actually... but kinda confusing for someone who din take proper piano training like me... hehe...) to do it [for me lah!] loh... and it will also take some time... which will be 'good' for my parents... at least i am not sitting in front of the computer the whole day again... haha...

oh so bored leh... you see lah... i dont watch television... no PS 2 for me... and i got NO MONEY to hang out and stuff... what can i do? haix... teach me lah... :(...

i am currently looking for a job... but well... you know lah... SPM nia... the salary is so damn freakingly LESS... like shit nia... :(

i will attend an interview section in a bank... most probably next week.. and the job is dunno what title lah... something like an office boy loh... then job responsibilities are... data entry... file-ling... customer service... check deposit... customer loan... bla bla bla... lots lah... :S and it is a three month contract... (same with my previous job leh... 3 months nia...) and the monthly salary so damn freakingly A BIT nia... so... haix... dont know lah... well i hope i can do lah... at least better than none mah... haha...

well anything?

Aeris Theme 1... 

Aeris Theme 2... 

Aeris Theme 3... 

Aeris Theme 4... 

hmm? 

sepia version... 

ubah bit d... 

piano player... artistic and special... will i be one like that? i hope so... 

mmm...

i really hate what my dad always tell me... act like i will never grow up...

for example, he always asks me to go to bathe... not ask but 'order' would be a better word... whether i did bathe or not he always made assumptions that i havent bathe yet... and scolded me... :(

i understand got love from parents is good... but honestly i dont think that his way of showing love suits me... :S...

honestly i hate it when not being trusted too... i just simply hate people who dont trust me... i dont know why but i hate that... :S...

ok... i assume that everyone trust me... (i know this assumption is a bit too ':S' but i assume that too... or i should say i hope that...) so... i really seldom go and tell other people that i am going out with someone or when will i get home or things purposely... so... dunno lah... someone maybe misunderstood or something... whatever... :(

he leng-zhai or not? hehe... someone loh... :P

* picture removed as required by the someone...

i want this... quite desperate for it... :P anyone wants to give me this?