something sad came to me...

mmm... well just now, which is about 6 plus, my ever first ex alex, suddenly came to me in msn...

the first thing he said is 'hmm...miss you...'

i was like :O and :@ then i replied with 'why leh? why miss me?'... well i was really angry that he dump me at first and yet he still dare to say that he miss me... what the hell...

maybe he knew that i was angry and frustrated then he said 'nothing... bye'

...

i asked him 'how are you?' and he replied 'terible'... i dont know why i asked him that... my heart went soft? i dont know... i really dont know... this is so... confusing? frustrating? sad? or whatever...

'what happened?' i asked again...

in 24 seconds' time, he asked me back 'do u noe y i wanna broke up wif u...?'

'you just went disappear' i said. and he explained 'actually...my family...'. 'they knew it?'

'yup...' he said and i asked him 'then?'

'i said i'm not..n find a gf'

'and? then?'

'now they move out dee.'

'tell me the whole thing' i said... i wanted to know what happened... i was curious... i wanted to know why would he treated me like that... i wanted to know everything...

he replied with a simple answer 'ok'

'now tell me what happened'

'wat u wanna noe?'

'everything'

'wat?'

'what happened from the time when they found you up until now'

well he said 'a lotz happens...i'm tired to sad...'

'you know another guy?' i asked.

'how dare?'

'have sex with anyone?'

' -.-""" '

'why not?'

'i said i found a gf. not a bf'

'then tell me lah. why arent you contacting me at all' this is the thing that i wanted to ask him for so long... since the day he dumped me...

' i dun wan to '*tuo ni xia shui' ' *tuo ni xia shui in chinese, means 'drag you into the water'*

he continued 'thay said wanna find out my bf that time'

'then?'

'so i stop contact u' well honestly this is a lame reason... i couldnt really accept this...

i continued to ask him 'handphone? why din bother to contact or at least a sms?'

and his answer was, 'that time i make a decision to be a straight guy ( a childish minded)'

'you tell me the whole thing lah... then what happened and whats next and stuff... i wanna know'

'u can find me at pragin. i work here everyday' he said.

'tell me through here'

'nope' he denied... as he said, 'hard to say'

'i want you to say it' i insisted, firmly 'here'

he thought for a while 'hmm...' and said 'i told u i'm bi rite?'

'fine then' wanted him to continue...

'however... i find a girl that time... n always bring her to house... to show my family that i'm straight... n i stop think bout queer things... n not contatc u at all...'

'tahtz all...' he ended.

'then?' i wanted to know more! MORE!

'now you a straight? congratulation' i teasingly asked him...

' -.-"""... thatz not possible' he replied.

'why not? since you always bring a girl home. well most probably you had sex with her too. haha.' was i being jealous? or frustrated?

'just acting k..?' he explained.

'then? now leh?'

'stay alone. working n studying... like this lo'

'what you want to tell me?' i asked him.

'just wan u to noe the truth. dun misunderstanding'

being sarcastic (is it?), i asked him 'you love me still?'

and he asked me back 'r u?'

not wanting to answer him straight, i said 'i am asking you'

'i dunno...coz now i'm just consentrat on my study n work' he replied.

'haha ok lah. study well.' being dont know what feeling, i said to him 'bye'

'bye' he said that to me too...

and well, the conversation ended.

...

well this is like writing a novel... haha... except that this 'novel' is based on what we really talked in msn just now... trust me... no 'faking stories'...

...

any comment?